Tuesday, 24 December 2013

12th Day of Blogmas: Worst Santa Imitators

Hello again avid blog readers! I'm very sorry to say that this blog post marks the 12th and final day of Blogmas. I know you all must be super distraught to hear this news. But, may I remind you, Christmas is tomorrow!!!!!

Anyway, for the final post, I thought it would be appropriate following yesterday's little Beneath the Santa Suit interview to rate some of the worst Santas found around the globe. Without further ado, here they are . . .


Well, at least you can say that this guy looks the part. However, it seems that he's not particularly good at his job. Making 2 children cry at one is actually quite an achievement, although probably an occupational hazard. Maybe he should consider a different line of work, one where it doesn't really matter whether or not you bring children to tears, or even better, encourages it. 


This is actually one of the creepiest things I've ever seen before in my life. What is that? That looks like a bearded zombie. If I were the head of a shopping centre, I would certainly not hire this guy to work for us. I'm actually surprised that the child in the photo isn't scarred for life, because I'm pretty sure I am. 


There are so many things wrong with this picture. First off, how can you be a red head, and then miraculously have a white beard? Second of all, since when did Santa where glasses? If the man can't see properly, how can he be entrusted with driving a sleigh? And most importantly, I think you know something's wrong when the person who's getting their Santa photo taken is older than Santa. 


This is just super, super disturbing. Santa is always associated with innocence and selflessness and the magic of Christmas, not perving at random women. It's just unnatural and wrong. If that has thoroughly disturbed me for the rest of my life, imagine how the little kids waiting next in line must be feeling. 


Wow, doesn't this look legit, and look at that enthusiasm. Let's get real, this guys's pretty bad at being Santa. He doesn't even care about what he's doing, well at least not enough to slap on a wig. Even the little boy he's with isn't buying it, and I don't blame him, I'd be laughing (or raging) too. 


This guy is one of the most unenthusiastic Santas I've ever seen. If I were their parents, I would definitely be demanding a refund immediately. The kid on the left of the photo can certainly feel the awkwardness. It kinda looks like this Santa's a massive pill popper, but that's just my opinion (and the opinion of anyone else with eyes). 


I feel sorry for that kid desperately trying to escape the clutch of Santa. I honestly don't blame him. I'd be in hysterics too if a living dead Santa was trying to attack me . Seriously though, just take a good look at that dude for a minute. If he doesn't scream zombie, I don't know what does. 


It's nice to see that certain shopping centres are becoming more open minded in regards to who they hire as their Santa for the year. Who knew that we would see cross dressing Santas so soon? You may be thinking 'hmm, now that's a bit harsh'. Though is it really? Just take a look at those racoon eyes. Some people might find his heavy eye make-up suspicious and shifty, but you know what, according to these photos, it seems creepy is in this Christmas season, so he fits right in. 


From this photo, you can basically learn this Santa's entire life story. Growing up, he was always the odd one out, going through life with the sole company of comic books. Now, in his old age, he's decided to spend his life grasping for his past youth, going about this by grasping onto little boys. Creepy much? I thought so. 

So that's the end of the list! I thought it would be nice to scar everyone for life once more before Christmas. You're welcome. Happy end of Blogmas everyone! And for tomorrow, I wish you guys the awesomest of Christmases. Seriously, have an amazeballs day! Til' next time . . .

Annabel xx

1 comment:

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