Friday, 6 September 2013
Teen Anti Bucket List
Hello again readers! Today's post revolves around the things that I hope I never do before I die (pretty much the opposite of a bucket list-hence the title). Some of them I am refusing to do due to intense hatred (there seems to be a trend on this blog already), some due to fear, and some due to pride. I've managed to condense this list to 7 things (not a Miley Cyrus song reference, I swear) after much internal battle. Here goes:
7. Post a cryptic Facebook message
Frequently occurring in the teen community, cryptic Facebook messages are one of the (many) banes of my existence. Facebook is confusing enough, without the addition of these incomprehensible statuses. Especially those weird relationship statuses, where everyone pretends to know everything there is to know about break-ups, when really they know absolutely nothing (which is probably why they're cryptic in the first place). That's why I have promised myself to never, ever, join the club and confuse everyone I know.
6. Become a Directioner
Despite the fact that I probably should, I actually don't hate 'One Direction'. I mean, please don't get me wrong, I'm not a fan, by any means. I just simply don't care. Unlike Justin Bieber (whom I hate, with a passion), I just have no interest whatsoever in the overpublicised group of tween magnets. So to become a Directioner? Absolutely, no way, is it ever going to happen. There is a massive difference between being able to listen to a 'One Direction' song for 30 seconds without wanting to light yourself on fire, and doodling 'Mrs Harry Styles' in your notebook while singing obnoxiously along to 'What Makes You Beautiful'.
5. Become a Hipster
Ugh. No, just no. I may not exactly be mainstream, but no way am I anywhere near Hipster territory (nor do I ever hope to be). The music, the fashion, the weird triangle symbol trend . . . not for me.
Ever. This is definitely a pride thing (and a hatred thing). I actually don't even understand them. A group of people who all strive to be different, so therefore band together and all act the same. Is there no logic left in the world? So I hope beyond all hope that my future self will never sink down to 'Hipster' level.
4. Become obsessed with Twitter
This one's a bit of a tough one. Yes, I do have twitter (for about a week now). As of yet, I have 0 new posts. Having the obsessive personality that I do, it may be rather difficult to stick with this. But I really don't want to be one of those people who tweets about everything they do, and have done in their entire life. I really don't care. And if I don't, imagine how others would feel reading about my fascinating trip to the supermarket, or my interesting task of unloading the dishwasher. So, here's hoping I have some sense of self control.
3. Buy another single by Miley Cyrus
No, absolutely not. As a former Miley fan, this decision was hard to come to. But after the 2013 VMA scandal, I think I have to come to the conclusion that the old Miley's never coming back. I'm not really interested in buying songs about lining up to get 'lines in the bathroom'. If I wanted that, I'd purchase a 'Best of Ke$ha' album (if one were to ever exist). So her new album 'Bangerz' won't be on my Christmas list this year. Or any year. Ever.
2. Use the term 'swag'
I don't know what it is, I don't pretend to know what it is, I don't want to know what it is. It's confusing, and can mean a variety of different things. It seems to be used frequently by teens in random contexts, and just seems stupid. I can't even use it ironically, because I don't understand it! I guess it's just one of those things that will forever evade me. I guess I'll just stick to yolo.
1. Watch 'Keeping Up With The Kardashians'
There are many reasons why I will never, ever watch this show. Mainly, it's a pride thing. I don't really know much about it to be honest, but the little premise I do know, doesn't interest me in the slightest. A bunch of conceited people dealing with 'real' problems? No thanks. Also, even from just watching the promos on TV, I can tell that it is heavily scripted. It all just seems really fake. However, a little bit of me is scared that if I delve into the world of the Kardashians, I'll never get out. I am secretly a sucker for reality television (despite its complete and utter lack of authenticity). So I just think, it's better not to start, for everybody's sake.
You've finally made it to the end (yay)! So that's it, my weird and completely random Anti Bucket List. Hope its been entertaining, or at least not totally boring. It seems that every blog I post involves angry rants about something, but why quit while you're ahead? Til' next time . . .