Hello again readers! In true Teenage Fanatic fashion, today I thought I'd take some time to have a bit of a complain about things in society which I strongly dislike. Today's topic of conversation? Public transport. Yes, I'm one of those people who gets driven everywhere by their parents. Am I ashamed of that? No, not at all. I seriously love it. In my opinion, why put yourself through the trouble of getting on a crowded vehicle full of strange people when you could hitch a ride with the people legally responsible for you while you still can? Saying this, no matter how much one tries to avoid it, catching public transport is pretty much inevitable. However, that doesn't mean we have to be happy about it (hence this massive ranting session you're about to endure). Intro over with, let's get into it . . .
1. You're Always Running Late. Always.
This is so true it almost hurts. Seriously, I could leave the house two hours early, yet I would still need to run in order to catch some sort of transportation. Why? I have absolutely no idea. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that the timetables are seriously messed up, or maybe the universe is just trying to make us cry. Either way, it's no fun. It seems even when you're trying to be early, there's some bus or train headed for your desired destination leaving the station just as you come bolting towards it. And no, it's really not avoidable.
2. You Have to Fight for your Seat
Because we've already established that the universe is totally and utterly against you when you decide to take public transport, your bus or train is always inevitably going to be jam packed with a bunch of (most likely annoying) people. However, it seems that those in charge of constructing these vehicles haven't quite copped on to that, and as a result, about 50% of travellers are forced to stand (and that's only a minor exaggeration). Most likely you'll be one of them, but that doesn't mean you can't put up a fight. As soon as you actually make it on the bus, it's every man and woman for themselves.
3. It Smells. A Lot.
Again, I really don't understand why, but public transport always smells like a unsavoury mash-up of urine and horrendous body odour. Personally, I think that everyone just bands together to plot against you, and decides to not shower for a number of weeks before hopping on a bus and standing right next to you, armpit on full display. You can try and hold your breath for as long as you can, but inevitably, you're going to have to endure the hideous pungency of unwashed humans, and that my friends is something no one should have to experience.
4. The People Are Really Weird.
I don't consider myself to be a conspiracy theorist, however, I feel like the entire population of public transport travellers are out to get me. I really don't mean to generalise, but to be fair, the majority of people you find on buses and trains are indeed really weird. You've got the random salesmen forcing you to take their pamphlets, the strange, slightly creepy hippies, the loudly spoken alternative folk, and perhaps worst of all, the ridiculously annoying, snotty-nosed youths (and yes, I'm dissing my own age group). All you can really do is hide in a corner and hope they don't approach you.
5. Trying not to Eavesdrop Proves to be Difficult
Even though you have absolutely nothing in common with the people who happen to be travelling with you, it really is difficult not to listen to their conversations. Sure, one of the contributing factors is that they happen to speak obnoxiously loudly and aren't aware of anyone else around them, but you have to admit, listening to the intricacies of other people's lives is always strangely interesting. However, subtlety has never been my strong suit, so this doesn't ever work out well for me. Plus, the self loathing you put yourself through for caring so much about these people's lives really isn't worth it.
So that's now the end of my pretty short, anti-transport rant post. I hope you can all sympathise, or at the very least, don't lose the morsel of respect you may have already had for me. Til' next time . . .