Happy Valentine's Day!

Greetings Blogosphere! Happy (delayed) Valentine's Day everyone! I don't mean to bring all you lovebirds down (kidding, I actually totally do), but I think Valentine's Day is a weird, redundant holiday. I know how it seems, anyone ever who says anything bad about Valentine's Day is obviously just sad and bitter, but believe it or not, this isn't actually the case. I have every other day of the year to be like that, why February 14th in particular? I much prefer the concept of 'desperation day':

But maybe that's just me. Anyway, I thought I'd do a little themed blog post (better late than never) ranking some of the weirdest Valentine's Day cards ever made. Pleasantries over and done with, here we go . . .

1. 

First off, you just have to love the Spongebob theme. I mean seriously, doesn't it just scream romance? Who would've come up with the idea to make a Spongebob themed Valentine's Day card? I have to give them props for that. I've always thought that Patrick starfish had a certain finesse about him, a wordsmith in his own right, and doesn't this just prove it. An excellent quote, an inspirational message, that right there ladies and gentlemen is art at its finest. It's just beautiful. What more can I say? A truly quality card.

2. 

I have to say, I am a major fan of this card. You've got to love its brutal honesty. For once, it addresses the elephant in the room. Seriously, what is with the nude baby with wings? How is that romantic? Cupid is seriously one messed up dude. Babies have no jurisdiction on Valentine's Day (or you know, any other day really). Also another thing, what's a baby even doing with a bow and arrow? That's just a tad dangerous, don't you think? I bet that violates some significant child protection laws. This card doesn't only bring some realism to Valentine's Day, it also happens to be a secret campaign for the rights of children, talk about the best of both worlds (suck on that Hannah Montana). 

3. 

Well isn't this just charming? I say that if you can't call someone a complete idiot on Valentine's Day, there's something wrong with the world. Seriously though, I'm not even a fan of batman and I still find this pretty awesome. Sure, it's not exactly romantic, but it's sends a message (a super offensive message). Let me just say, if I were to receive this, I'd be pretty excited (let's face it, you would be to, it's pretty cool). 

4. 

If you think about it, this is the biggest compliment you can ever give a person. This is actually a super nice card. We all know Kanye loves Kanye even more than he loves jumping up onstage and interrupting people's acceptance speeches (which is a reason I will forever respect him- Taylor Swift should never be allowed to speak, ever). So this is just a really nice message. Yeah, it's hidden underneath Kanye West, but if you look hard enough, you'll find the flattering remark somewhere there. 

5. 

Isn't this just beautiful? Even as a proud vegetarian, I can totally support this. What else screams romance? Chicken wings just say it all. Trying to work out how to confess your love for someone? No problem, stop by KFC on the way home and get a romantic bucket of popcorn chicken for two. And you have to give the card credit, it is indeed true that you can't spell wingman without wing, so at least it's got linguistics on its side.


It seems that you've now reached the end of my super short, super random semi anti Valentine's Day post.

Now go enjoy the rest of your lives. Til' next time . . .

Annabel xx

Most Depressing Kids' Movies

Hello again my readers! I'm sorry to inform you that the blog post I have in store for you all today may bring your depression levels to an all time high (because let's face it, what good blog doesn't do that?). Yes, we are revisiting some of the most depressing kids' movies of all time. How they were shown to the under 12's I do not know, and how they're not scarred for life is another question all together. Without further ado, here they are in no particular order. . .

Bambi

Do I even need a further explanation? 'Bambi' is renowned for being one of the most depressing movies ever, let alone kids' movies. It's all going swell for everyone, until BAM, Bambi's mum bites the dust. Seriously, what is wrong with you Disney? Why just go and ruin million of children's lives? Shame on you. And it's not like Bambi's mother could've just died of natural causes or something, oh no, that would've been too jolly for that saddest Walt Disney, she had to be brutally shot. Granted, you don't actually see it, but that doesn't make it any less depressing. I've heard all these stories about kids getting all cray and hysterical while watching this movie, and I don't blame them, it's awful! Who kills off a deer in an animated kids' movie? It's just wrong. 

Bridge to Terabithia

Once again, need I say more? What starts off as your typical 'loser meets hipster' movie, quickly morphs into something super depressing and gloomy. It starts off fine, this boy named Jesse meets this girl named Leslie who welcomes him into her little enchanted land called 'Terabithia' (hence the title). They become friends, they have fun, you know, just normal, happy movie stuff. Everything's seriously all hunky dory until the rope Leslie's swinging on to get to Terabithia breaks and she's dead. Dead! Not even just severely concussed, dead! They kill off the one character in the entire movie who was supposed to be this carefree figure and show everyone different ways of looking at the world. But no, they just couldn't let her live. Even Zooey Deschanel agrees that it was a major downer, and she was in the movie!

I mean, I get that it was a book first, so it's not really the movie's fault for sticking to the plot line, but still, it's awful and shouldn't exist. 

Charlotte's Web

Yep, it seems that death is some kind of theme in this list. Who would've thought that kids' movies with major character deaths would be considered depressing? I think we all know the story of Charlotte's Web. You know, helpful spider befriends nice pig, then helpful spider cruelly dies in the middle of the story. The death of Charlotte legitimately crushed the dreams of so many children. What is wrong with the world? Seriously, why can't everyone just live. If I were the writer of Charlotte's Web, I would just write a story about a spider and a pig who formed an unlikely friendship and then spent the rest of their lives yoloing together. It would've been the best story ever, but no, death had to be the outcome. I don't even like Wilbur, he's super annoying! If the pig had died, it wouldn't have been as sad. Why kill off the all-knowing female character? It's just sexist. 

Up

Even though the majority of the movie isn't actually all that depressing, the first 5 minutes have well and truly earned it a place on this list. It starts off with all these little flashbacks of this old man's life. You see that he met this girl when he was young, and then you see them grow old together and it's all really nice and cute. Also, one of the first things you have to understand is that I seriously love old people. They're cute and little, and always tell odd stories, what's not to like? So when we find out that the old woman died, leaving behind a bitter old man, well that was just awful. I seriously couldn't even enjoy the rest of that movie because of the first 5 minutes. Why couldn't Pixar have just let the old people be happy together? Sure, it would've been a pretty boring movie, but who cares, they both would've survived! 

Wall.E

First thing's first, I hate this movie. Not just because it was depressing, I just seriously hate absolutely everything about this movie. With pretty much everything else on this list, despite their admittedly majorly depressing moments, I still thought they were pretty good movies. But this, this was just awful. First of all, who thought that a futuristic, mainly silent robot would be a good idea for a movie? Secondly, why is there no speaking in the film for basically the first 45 minutes? That doesn't entertain anyone. And when the dialogue begins, the movie doesn't get any better. It's all about this dystopian future where all humans are morbidly obese and floating around in chairs. I have to admit, the thought of never having to exercise again is pretty tempting, but having to become a 'Biggest Loser' contestant lookalike? No thank you. 

Where the Wild Things Are

For the life of me, I cannot tell you any major plot points of this movie. The only thing I remember is leaving the movie theatre on the verge of depression (and probably insanity). I know that there was a kid in a costume, and a bunch of weird, creepy animals with him in some sort of forest that sporadically turned into a desert (because that's obviously logical). I honestly can't even remember anything else about it. All I can tell you is that the movie is actually just the worst thing to watch. It sucks all the life out of everything ever. I'm pretty sure that it could've actually legitimately given someone depression it was that bad. Apparently it was supposed to be some kind of deep and meaningful metaphor for the human condition, but I honestly don't even care, it was just so dismal it was ridiculous. 

So that's (thankfully) the end of my list. Hopefully I haven't forced too many of you to turn to anti-depressants after reading this. Feel free to continue your ordinary lives now, and maybe make a vow to never watch any of these movies. Til' next time . . .

Annabel xx

Vampires: Separating the Lame from the Awesome

Hello again blogosphere! Welcome to another weird and wacky blog post where I just basically share my strange inner ramblings with my fellow internet addicts. It seems that I've once again delved into the world of the supernatural, helping you to determine whether or not the vampire you're evaluating (which will hopefully be in a TV show or movie, and not roaming the Earth) is awesome or just extremely lame. Let's get started . . .

SEEK: The Ability for Vampires to be Killed with a Stake

According to vampire folklore (which is apparently a thing), it is traditional for vampires to be killed with a stake to the heart. Luckily, in most cases in popular culture, this still seems to be the case. However, some new little vampire shows and movies have decided to be total hipsters and forgo this (in my opinion, necessary) convention. You don't believe me, you don't think this could possibly be true? May I introduce to you exhibit A, Twilight.  Horrid, horrid Twilight. This is the first of many bashings it will receive in this blogpost. Apparently, according to Stephanie Meyers, the only way a vampire can be killed is by their own kind, or a werewolf. Where is that logic? Say there someone was trying to rid the world of vampires for good (a vampire slayer even), how would they do it? Each time, they'd have to get another vampire to do the job for them, and then get another one after that to kill the vampire who helped them out, it's a vicious circle. Bottom line is, if you can stake them and they die, you're on the right track to finding one awesome vampire. 

AVOID: Vampires who Sparkle in the Sun

Yep, once again get prepared for some Twilight bashing. For this little awful addition alone, Stephanie Meyer should be shunned for life. May I ask, what kind of vampires sparkle? What does that even mean? It's common knowledge that when vampires are exposed to sunlight, they combust, it's just a thing. What makes Stephanie Meyer think she can shake things up and mess with folklore? It's just cray and wrong, so very wrong. Also, even though the rest of the book was a joke anyway, making the vampires sparkle is just adding insult to injury. Sparkling isn't cool, it never will be. It's just super, super lame. How is it plausible for blood-sucking, ruthless creatures to sparkle in the sun? Sparkling doesn't exactly bring to mind soulless creatures of the night. Since when does that make sense? Even in 'The Vampire Diaries', where vampires are commonly seen roaming the streets in broad daylight, there's an explanation for it. What excuse do you have Twilight (other than sucking)?

SEEK: A Vampire Game Face

What could this possibly mean? What is this vampire game face I speak of? Well feast your eyes on this. 

The morphed, crinkled face, the yellow eyes, the fangs. It all just screams vampire. If a vampire just rocked up with some slightly pointy teeth and major B.O, that wouldn't be impressive or even vaguely scary. It's all about the look. Pair that game face with an ominous trench coat and maybe some sort of cape, and you've got yourself one hard core vampire. I mean, I don't mean to sound shallow, but aesthetics really are important. You can't just get any pasty guy to pose as the undead, they need to have the scare factor. If they evoke fear, they're in the clear.

AVOID: Vampires who don't need Blood to Survive

A integral part of what makes vampires who they are is the fact that they need blood to survive, it's just a thing. So for anyone to mess with that is seriously wrong. Luckily, the majority of writers are smart enough to stick to this rule, as to not send the world into a new realm of cray (or force themselves to face my wrath, which is obviously equally important). However, there are always exceptions. Once again, it seems that this exception was made by none other than Stephanie Meyer. She just can't stick to tradition, can she? Apparently, vampires can survive on your everyday, human balanced diet. Throw in a steak, some pasta, a fancy wine and you've got yourself one content vampire. There are so many things wrong with this. For one, why is Edward moping around all the time? It would make sense if he were a remorseful vampire, having trouble coming to terms with the fact that he has to kill humans to survive as he is being tortured by his own soul day in and day out. But no, he's just randomly moody all the time for no reason at all. What's with that? It's ridiculous. And wrong, very wrong.

SEEK: Vampires that can't be seen in Mirrors

Once again referring to that pesky folklore, it is a well known fact that vampires can't be seen in any reflective surface. However, quite a few writers have decided to go a little cray and render this rule redundant. Once again, Twilight falls into that category. However, this time, it's not alone, as alongside it is 'The Vampire Diaries'. What makes it different from (and better than) Twilight is that they at least reference the lack of reflection, talking about how it's some kind of vampire myth. In Twilight, it's just some kind of unspoken rule breaking. Pretty much everyone else seems to follow this rule, and for that, I deem them awesome. What fun would it be if you were about to be attacked by a vampire and could see them coming from a mile away? It's all about the sneak attack. Also, with true vampires, there's no photographic evidence, which just makes it even better. 

AVOID: Vampires Without a Sense of Humour

I thought it was only appropriate to finish this post the way I started it- by bashing Twilight. Let's face it, some vampires would've been around for hundreds, even thousands of years, you think they wouldn't have picked up a few jokes on the way? Yeah yeah, you can have all that tortured soul, bloodthirsty stuff going on as well, but why do they have to take themselves so seriously? Again, I turn to you Twilight. Seriously, suck it up (no pun intended- kidding, there was totally a pun intended). But seriously, what's with the constant emo demeanour Edward? Maybe stop taking yourself so seriously and crack a joke every once in a while. What's wrong with you? Also, on a totally unrelated note, perhaps stop staying stuff like 'hop on spider monkey', or 'you're my own personal brand of heroin', because that comes off super creepily. 

All in all, I think we can gather that Twilight is the worst piece of literature and multimedia on Earth. Seriously, that's not an overstatement. Even Robert Patterson agrees with me!

And that's officially the end. Til' next time . . .

Annabel xx

So Long January: Hiya February

Hello again readers! I can now officially announce that it is no longer January! How quickly did that go? It's ridiculous. Anyway, as I usually do when a month ends and another one begins, I'm going to give January a proper goodbye by remembering some of the major, memorable events that helped to kick off 2014. Pleasantries complete, let's get into it.

5. Awards Season

As you have probably gathered from my multiple award show posts recently, we are smack bang in the middle of awards season. January, as always, kicks things off with the Grammys, the Golden Globes, the Screen Actors Guild Awards and a bunch of other stuff. It's seriously cray. So of course these award shows are memorable, how could we forget some of the hideous fashion choices and super odd behaviour shown at these events? 

4. Kaley Cuoco gets married in secret

Yes, I know that this happened on the 31st of December last year, but to be fair, the news didn't come out until the next day. Plus, due to the time difference, I heard it a day later in Australia. Anyway, enough of my excuses. So yeah, this happened. Kaley Cuoco secretly got married to Ryan Sweeting at the end of last year (which we've already established I'm counting as this year). Plus, what was probably even more of a shocker was that she didn't go down the traditional wedding dress route, rather she wore pink! As a major fan of the colour, I'm a supporter (but I'm probably the only one based on the intense internet ridicule). Even though it seems all of this happened pretty fast, it's become super official now that Kaley's name in the credits of 'The Big Bang Theory' has changed to 'Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting'. You know a relationship's serious when a TV show changes it's credits, there's no going back now. 

3. Glee prepares for it's 100th Episode

Again, this is me being totally biased, but whatever. It's a big thing! Glee's been around since 2009, and now it's finally reaching 100 episodes! That's pretty cool, you have to admit it. Plus, all of the original cast is coming back (except Cory Monteith, of course [insert sad, super depressed face here]). There are also some super cool special guest stars appearing. We've got Chace Crawford (Nate from 'Gossip Girl) and a returning Kristin Chenoweth and Gwyneth Paltrow. How exciting (for no-life Gleeks like me at least)! 

2. Osborne's vs the Hill's

No, this is not some sort of elaborate dream I had, this is legit. It seems that these two famous families had a little run in at the pre Grammys party. Picture an enraged Sharon Osborne throwing food at Jonah Hill's brother. Yeah, things got a bit cray to say the least. Apparently, the tension going on between these two has been prevalent for years, but obviously flared up at this party. Things were going back and forth, and then suddenly food was as well. It all ended with a final glass of water being tossed, before Jonah's brother Jordan finally got up and left. Talk about theatrics. 

1. Justin Bieber gets arrested

I hate that he/she managed to make it to number one, but it seems that the Bieb's shenanigans have reached an all time high. The 19 year old was arrested last week for drag racing and driving under the influence (which is a double whammy considering he's underage). This is just ridiculous, what does he even think he's doing? I don't even know. But one thing's for certain, according to the mugshot released by the Miami Beach Police Department, it seems Justin Bieber has stopped using proactiv. 

We've now reached the end of my short, weird, monthly post. Now we can all officially wave goodbye to January and say hello to February.

Yep, that's it. I'm officially done. Til' next time . . .

Annabel xx

5 Similarities between The Rocky Horror Picture Show and Shakespeare

Greetings again my readers! I know you all must be thinking that this title is some sort of gibberish, and that I've finally lost it completely. But no, believe it or not my vague sanity (vague being the operative word) is still intact. I in fact have managed to whip out some of my super cool analysis skills and find some similarities between these two admittedly polar opposites.

Number One: Prologue

I'm assuming you're all familiar with 'Romeo and Juliet', whether it be the original play or one of the two movie remakes. If you're not, well first of all, what is wrong with you? And second of all, do me a favour and go read the prologue. In this little introduction, the entire plot of the play is basically revealed. But how does this relate to 'The Rocky Horror Picture Show'? Well I'm so glad you asked. Remember that little song at the beginning called 'Science Fiction Double Feature'? If you actually listen to the lyrics, it basically outlines the main plot points of the movie. Sure, at first it just kinda sounds like a bunch of nonsense (which admittedly, most of it is), but when you think about it, it all starts to make a bit of sense. 'Dr X will build the creature', 'See Androids fighting', this pretty much just gives away the whole movie. 

Number Two: Character Parallels 

Did you ever think that you would be comparing Dr Frank N Furter to Prospero from Shakespeare's 'The Tempest'? My guess is probably not. Well today's your lucky day, because things are about to get cray. To kick things off, both of these previously mentioned guys are pretty controlling to put it nicely. They're both the mastermind behind grand plans, manipulating all of the people who surround them to get what they want, and that's just the beginning. They both have their untamed creatures (Caliban and Rocky), who they are in total control of (for the most part at least). They also both have this complex about going home throughout the entire story, both of them having to relinquish their power by doing so (maybe in Frank N Furter's case it's not so much relinquish, and more like having it taken from him forcefully, but whatever, same thing). Plus, they both belt out some pretty cool musical numbers. Prospero gets his little performance in the form of 'The Masque of the Goddesses', and of course Frank N Furter gets his rather extravagant floor show.

Number Three: Themes

Despite the vague subheading, I'm not just going to grasp at straws to find something worthwhile for this one. There are in fact some legitimate themes prevalent in both Rocky Horror and Shakespeare. First off, there's the whole Shakespearean theme of a young couple (Brad and Janet) going off into the woods before things get cray, and the line between sanity and madness starts to blur as the two characters begin to morph and change, a la 'A Midsummer Night's Dream', 'As You Like It' and 'Twelfth Night'. There are also a bunch of other themes that you'll find scattered throughout Shakespearean comedies such as deflated arrogance, twist endings and the concept of servants becoming masters.

Number Four: Improbable Plot

It's no secret that 'The Rocky Horror Show' is one super duper weird piece of work. Living inside the mind of the writer and director (who also happens to play Riff Raff in the movie) would surely mess a person up for life. So yeah, it's no surprise that the extravagant, majorly insane plot also happens to be totally improbable. It also appears to be the case that the majority of Shakespearean comedies (and TBH, tragedies too most of the time) often follow this nonsensical, ridiculously unrealistic route. In fact, there are even a couple of specific similarities between these utterly cray storylines. In Shakespeare's little, totally obscure tale 'A Midsummer Night's Dream', a drug is dripped by Puck onto the eyelids of four lovers at Oberon's request, which certainly draws some parallels to the LSD spray Frank N Furter gets Riff Raff to spray on everyone in the lab. Coincidence? I think not.

Number Five: Cross-Dressing

Let's face it, this one is pretty obvious. As soon as you read the title of this blog post, I'm sure cross-dressing was the first thing that sprung to mind. That's probably because it's super true. I don't think I really have to explain the cross-dressing element in Rocky Horror, it's all pretty self explanatory. However, there is a long history of cross-dressing in the theatre which the majority of you probably already know. No women were allowed, so men had to frock up channel their inner castrato. Specifically, when Shakespeare's 'As You Like It' and 'Twelfth Night' were first performed, not only were male actors parading around as women, they were pretending to be women who were pretending to be men. If that doesn't scream 'Rocky Horror' then I don't know what does.

And that's the end of my weird, random post. I hope you found it somewhat interesting and entertaining, and that I haven't blown your mind too much. That's all for now. Til' next time . . .

Annabel xx

2014 Grammy Awards Round Up

Hello blogosphere! Today marks the 56th Annual Grammy Awards, known as 'the loudest awards show on television'. Well I'm not sure about that, but as I am with every award show, I'm super pumped and excited (because I'm really sad and have no life). Also, as I did with the Golden Globes, I am officially blogging live! It could get radical, things could get cray, nobody knows. Intro over, it's time to officially get things started . . .

Best and Worst Dressed

Yes, judgement time has come again. It's time for me to become super opinionated and determine who was best and worst dressed at this year's Gramm awards. As usual, I'm going to start with the best dressed, because I'm just a lovely person. 

Best Dressed

Anna Kendrick

Presenter at the award show and star of musical movie 'Pitch Perfect' Anna Kendrick I think looked super awesome. I liked her dress, I liked her hair, I liked her shoes, what else is there? It was a nice collaboration, and I can definitely say I'm a fan of it. Even though I'm still not entirely sure what she was doing there and why they asked her to present, I think she definitely earned her place on my best dressed list. 

Ciara

Pregnant, one-name singer Ciara looked super fabulous tonight. The gold was a nice touch, and she rocked pregnancy well. I'd actually never heard of her before (which is really sad considering her level of fame, but whatever), but she really looked super awesome. Perhaps she should give Drew Barrymore some tips for her next award show. 

Katy Perry

This dress is probably going to have a lot said about it, but personally, I really liked it. I thought it was cute and quirky, and obviously, it was music themed, so that's appropriate. When you hear that Katy Perry has stepped onto the red carpet, you know it's going to be something bold and something that makes a statement, and I thought this was really nice. It was pretty and elegant, and it was just very her. Plus, she's Katy Perry, she can wear whatever she wants.

Pink

Surprisingly, Pink looked pretty normal tonight. With her, you sometimes don't really know what you're going to get. Is it going to be simple, is out going to be out there? We just don't know. But today, she went with something rather simple, and absolutely rocked it. I like the red, and I like the style, I just liked it all. She looked really awesome and has officially made a splash on my best dressed list.

Chrissy Teigen

The final addition to my best dressed list is model and spouse of John Legend, Chrissy Teigen It seems that I'm a fan of the sparkly gold this year, because I think she looked awesome. She kind of looks like a mermaid, which can only be a good thing. It's always awkward when you out dress the person you're attending the Grammys with (especially if that person is John Legend). 

Worst Dressed

Madonna

I honestly don't even know what's going on here. The creepy hat, the MJ gloves, the gangster grill, this is a mess. Also, just a tip, if you're dressed the same as your 10 year old son to an award show (or anywhere in public), you're doing something wrong. 

Fantasia Barrino 

I really, really don't like this. I'm still not entirely sure why, but all I know is that this is just awful. It kind of looks like a cover up that she's just chucked on over a swimming costume (an ugly cover up at that). Maybe it would be suitable for Coachella, but not for the Grammys. 

Skylar Grey

This is actually quite revolting. I hate everything about it, absolutely everything. One, who wears nude coloured leather, on anything, ever? Two, why is there a massive hole in your dress Skylar? And three, you look like a naked, tattooed mermaid. Not good, at all, by any stretch of the imagination. 

Chrisette Michele

This is one weird looking . . . thing. I don't even know what to call it. I give her props for trying to be original, but that's where the praise stops. It just kinda looks like there was a really cheap garage sale and she bought a bunch of mismatching stuff and decided to rock up to the grammys. It's weird, and not in a good way. 

Paula Patton

It seems that Paula Patton decided to show up to the Grammys as a zebra. First the Golden Globes, now this. Her fashion choices haven't been vaguely smart this awards season. This dress is actually kind of creepy. It's just a matter of time before PETA are on to her. 

The Actual Award Show

After the initial musical performance (which I'll talk about in another subheading), Grammys host LL Cool J came on  for his little introduction. And by little, I legitimately mean it was only about 2 minutes. In that time, he basically managed to compliment every artist in the audience. I guess that's one way to win over the crowd, but it wasn't really that entertaining for anybody at home. Seriously, when he started talking about Taylor Swift's song writing, how he didn't slip in a joke at her expense I do not know. Well, he's LL Cool J, he can do whatever he wants. 

And the winners are . . .

Daft Punk

- Album of the Year

- Best Dance/Electronica Album, 'Random Access Memories'
- Best Engineered Album, 'Random Access Memories'

Lorde

- Song of the Year, 'Royals' 

- Best Pop Solo Performance, 'Royals'

Kacey Musgraves

- Best Country Album, 'Same Trailer Different Park'

- Best Country Song, 'Merry Go 'Round'

Bruno Mars

- Best Pop Vocal Album, 'Unorthodox Jukebox'

Jay Z Featuring Justin Timberlake/Justin Timberlake Featuring Jay Z

- Best Rap/Sung Collaboration, 'Holy Grail'

- Best Music Video, 'Suit and Tie'

Dave Grohl, Paul McCartney, Krist Novoselic and Pat Smear

- Best Rock Song, 'Cut Me Some Slack'

Daft Punk Featuring Pharrell Williams and Nile Rodgers

- Best Pop Duo/Group Performance, 'Get Lucky'
- Record of the Year, 'Get Lucky'

Macklemore and Ryan Lewis

- Best New Artist

- Best Rap Performance, 'Thrift Shop'

- Best Rap Song, 'Thrift Shop'

- Best Rap Album, 'the Heist'

Led Zepplin

- Best Rock Album, 'Celebration Day'

Black Sabbath

- Best Metal Performance, 'God Is Dead?'

Pharrell Williams

- Producer of the Year, Non-Classical

Vampire Weekend

- Best Alternative Music Album, 'Modern Vampires of the City'

Imagine Dragons

- Best Rock Performance, 'Radioactive' 

Darius Rucker

- Best Country Solo Performance, 'Wagon Wheel'

the Civil Wars

- Best Country Duo/Group Performance, 'From This Valley'

Paul McCartney

- Best Music Film, 'Live Kisses'
- Best Boxed or Special Limited Edition Package, 'Wings Over America' (with 'Wings')
- Best Surround Sound Album, 'Live Kisses'

Ben Harper With Charlie Musselwhite

- Best Blues Album, 'Get Up!'

Alicia Keys

- Best R&B Album, 'Girl on Fire'

Rihanna 

- Best Urban Contemporary Album, 'Unapologetic'

Justin Timberlake

- Best R&B Song, 'Pusher Love Girl'

Gary Clarke Jr.

- Best Traditional R&B Performance, 'Please Come Back'

Snarky Puppy With Lalah Hathaway

- Best R&B Performance, 'Something'

Herb Alpert

- Best Pop Instrumental Album, 'Steppin' Out'

Zedd Featuring Foxes

- Best Dance Recording, 'Clarity'

Michael Bublé

- Best Traditional Pop Vocal Album, 'to Be Loved'

Laura Sullivan

- Best New Age Album, 'Love's River'

Wayne Shorter

- Best Improvised Jazz Solo, 'Orbits'

Gregory Porter

- Best Jazz Vocal Album, 'Liquid Spirit'

Terri Lyne Carrington

- Best Jazz instrumental Album, Money Jungle: Provocative in Blue

Randy Brecker

- Best Large Jazz Ensemble Album, Night in Calisia

Paquito D'Rivera and Trio Corrente

- Best Latin Jazz Album, 'Song for Maura'

Tasha Cobbs

- Best Gospel/Contemporary Christian Music Performance, 'Break Every Chain'

The Tribbertt

- Best Gospel Song, 'If He Did it Before . . . Same God'

- Best Gospel Album, 'Greater Than'

Mandisa

- Best Contemporary Christian Music Song, 'Overcomer'

- Best Contemporary Christian Music Album, 'Overcomer'

Draco Rosa

- Best Latin Pop Album, 'Vida'

La Santa Cecilia 

- Best Latin Rock, Urban or Alternative Album, 'Treinta Días'

Mariachi Divas De Cindy Shea

- Best Regional Mexican Music Album (Including Tejano), 'A Mi Manera'

Pacific Mambo Orchestra

- Best Tropical Latin Album, 'Pacific Mambo Orchestra'

Steve Martin and Edie Brickell

- Best American Roots Song, 'Love Has Come For You'

Emmylou Harris and Rodney Crowell

- Best Americana Album, 'Old Yellow Moon'

Ziggy Marley

- Best Reggae Album, 'Ziggy Marley in Concert'

Gipsy Kings

- Best World Music Album, 'Savor Flamenco' (tie)

Ladysmith Black Mambazo

- Best World Music Album, 'Live: Singing for Peace Around the World' (tie)

Guy Clark

- Best Folk Album, 'My Favourite Picture of You'

Jennifer Gasoi

- Best Children's Album, 'Throw A Penny In the Wishing Well'

Stephen Colbert

- Best Spoken World Album, 'America Again: Re-becoming the Greatness We Never Weren't'

Kathy Griffith

- Best Comedy Album, 'Calm Down Gurrl'

Kinky Boots

- Best Musical Theatre Album

Sound City

- Best Compilation Soundtrack for Visual Media, Real to Reel

Skyfall

- Best Score Soundtrack for Visual Media, Thomas Newman

- Best Song Written for Visual Media, Adele

the Clare Fischer Orchestra

- Best Instrumental Composition, 'Pensamientos for Solo Alto Saxophone and Chamber Orchestra'

Gordon Goodwin's Big Phat Band

- Best Instrumental Arrangement, 'on Green Dolphin Street'

Bobby McFerrin and Esperanza Spalding

- Best Instrumental Arrangement Accompanying Vocalist, 'Swing Low'

Reckless Kelly

- Best Recording Package, 'Long Night Moon'

John Coltrane

- Best Album Notes, 'Afro Blue Impressions'

the Rolling Stones

- Best Historical Album, 'Charlie Is My Darling'

Lana Del Ray

- Best Remixed Recording, Non Classical, 'Summertime Sadness'

Dawn Upshaw, Maria Schneider, Australian Chamber Orchestra and St. Paul Chamber orchestra

- Best Engineered Album, Classical, 'Winter Morning Walks'

David Frost

- Producer of the Year, Classical

Minnesota Orchestra

- Best Orchestral Performance, 'Sibelius: Symphonies Nos. 1 and 4'

the Metropolitan Opera Orchestra: the Metropolitan Opera Chorus

- Best Opera Recording, 'Adès: the Tempest'

Tui Hirv and Rainer Vilu; Estonian Philharmonic Chamber Choir; Sinfonietta Riga and Tallinn Chamber Orchestra; Latvian Radio Choir and Vox Clamantis

- Best Choral Performance, Pärt: Adam's Lament

Brad Wells and Roomful of Teeth

- Best Chamber Music/Small Ensemble Performance, 'Roomful of Teeth'

Albany Symphony

- Best Classical Instrumental Solo, Corigliano: Conjurer - Concerto for Percussionist and String Orchestra

Maria Schneider; Jay Anderson, Frank Kimbrough and Scott Robinson; Australian Chamber Orchestra and St. Paul Chamber Orchestra

- Best Classical Vocal Solo, 'Winter Morning Walks'

- Best Contemporary Classical Composition, 'Winter Morning Walks

Facing the Music

Never before have I had to sit through so many music performances in an awards show. Seriously, not even in the Tonys. So get prepared for some brutally honest music reviews. Just a warning now, if you're a fan of Taylor Swift, don't even bother reading this section. 

Beyonce and Jay Z

Kicking off the music packed award show was the winner of 17 Grammy Awards, the one and only Beyonce. She graced us with a pitch perfect performance of 'Drunk in Love' from her new album. She began solo, singing away like only Beyonce can, until her husband Jay Z joined her for some part time partial dancing and part time rapping. I honestly think this is the first time I've actually praised a musical performance at an award show on my blog. But then I guess if  there wasn't good music at the Grammys, there would be no hope for any other show. 

Lorde

Having to follow the performance of Beyonce was 17 year old New Zealander 'Lorde' performing her nominated single 'Royals', which is admittedly super catchy. Yeah, she has a super quirky, gravel like voice, but I actually kinda like it. Her performance of the song was a little more low key than the recorded version, which I also thought was cool. She added in some variations for the people listening at home, because if we wanted to listen to something which sounded identical to the recording, we'd just buy the single on iTunes. Also, may I just say, her back up singers were pretty cool with their harmonies, and what sucks is that they didn't even get filmed! But besides that, I didn't really have any complaints, I actually thought it was really good. I know, I'm on a role with compliments today, it's ridiculous. Don't worry, T Swift is coming up soon, I'll definitely snap out of it then. 

Hunter Hayes

Next up was 22 year old Hunter Hayes (who I'd never heard of before), who debuted his new song 'Invisible' while accompanying himself on piano. As he sang, quotes from various artists and celebrities were flashing across the screen. It's actually quite a pretty song, but this guy seemed like he was kinda struggling with it. His voice was majorly strained, and I felt like quickly fetching him a glass of water. He also has a major articulation problem, I couldn't really understand what he was saying at all. It was kind of disappointing, because I really did quite like the song. I just would've liked it more if they got a guy to come on stage who could actually sing it.

Katy Perry

Katy Perry rocked the stage with a majorly theatrical performance which looked like it could've been plucked right out of a stage show as she performed her song 'Dark Horse' from her new album. Although this new song of hers isn't my favourite one from the album, her live performance delivered. Although it was a spectacle, the scenery and dancers didn't overshadow her vocal performance which I thought was admirable. It was entertaining, and her vocals sounded great. Plus, it's Katy Perry. What more could you ask for?

Robin Thicke and Chicago

'Blurred Lines' singer came in swinging as he sang along with the band 'Chicago' to perform 'Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?'. I have to say, I was pleasantly surprised. I didn't even know if Robin Thicke could sing or not, but it turns out he definitely can. He was actually really good. It was a nice touch when he and the band broke into 'Blurred Lines' in the middle of the song. Again, he added some variations from the the recorded version which is always nice. Turns out, he can be charismatic without Miley Cyrus in her underwear doing unmentionable things with a foam finger. 

Keith Urban and Gary Clark Jr.

This unlikely duo came together to perform 'Cop Car'. I have to say, I'm not really a fan of either of their music, but it was a really nice performance. The harmonies were great, and both of them deliver in live performances. It was a bit boring, but I guess that's just me. Again, it' not really my genre, but for what it was, I thought they did a good job. That's all I can really say, because TBH, I only really listened to half of it before I zoned out.

John Legend

Next was 9 time grammy winner John Legend, who made things more intimate with his acoustic performance of his song 'All Of Me', as he accompanied himself on the piano. Despite his grammy wins, I'd never actually heard of him before (however I had heard the song, because I don't actually live under a rock). His voice is actually really nice, and I liked that his performance was pretty low key. It was just an overall super nice performance and it was nice to have a break from all of the hardcore, theatrical displays.

Taylor Swift

This little re-cap actually pains me to write, however it pained me more to watch. She started off her performance at the piano, with a rather lack lustre vocal rendition of her song 'All Too Well'. It was almost as if she was experimenting with how to use her voice, like she was trying to learn how to sing in front of millions of people at a televised award show. Her voice was wavering, and her traditional nasally tone was out in full swing. When she tried to belt, it just sounded awkward and strained and awful. It really was not pleasant to listen. What made it even sadder was that she was really getting in to it. I think she thought she was nailing it. Whenever there was an instrumental break, she'd do these majorly weird, powerful hair flips which kind of made it look like she was having a seizure (which at least would explain the sub par singing). Also, I have absolutely no idea how that song could ever pass of as country ever. Her performance has left me angry and uncomfortable, just as I thought it would. 

Pink feat. Nate Ruess

Ever the performer, Pink began the song strung above the crowd in a fabric trapeze, singing her song 'Try'. I honestly don't know how she managed to do it, but she was able to sound really awesome while flipping and rolling upside down. She wasn't just harnessed into the trapeze, she was spinning and climbing and rolling and managing to be a professional gymnast and a professional singer. That is a talent. Eventually, she came down from the trapeze, where she began vigorously dancing with a random guy. The song then died down, as Nate Ruess came and stage and began belting the beginning of their duet 'Just Give Me A Reason'. In that short introduction, Pink managed to change her clothes and casually stroll on stage as if she hadn't just been flipping in mid air. Their harmonies were really great, and they both sounded super awesome. It was nice that movement in that song was fairly minimal considering the spectacle that we witnessed a minute before hand.

Ringo Starr

Performing his 1973 song 'Photograph' was ex Beatle Ringo Starr. He seemed pretty jolly as he was performing, and I have to say, for a 73 year old, he did pretty well. He was in tune, he was entertaining, and he seemed to be enjoying himself, what more can you ask for? The photos of him and the Beatles being shown in the background also helped to pump up the audience and make everyone nostalgic (well, those people who were alive when they were around). He got a standing ovation, so that was cool for him. I guess that's all I can say about that. What else is there, it's Ringo Starr?

Kendrick Lamar and Imagine Dragons

Once again, we're treated to another theatrical performance as they sing a mash-up of 'Radioactive' and 'm.A.A.d city'. It was quite a spectacle, everyone dressed in white as red, laser like lights filled the stage in a display that would most likely send an epileptic into a fit. I also feel quite sorry for everyone in the audience, as the amount of artificial smoke that filled the hall probably would've made it hard to breathe (poor asthmatics). Besides posing quite a few health risks, I thought the two mismatched groups worked quite well together. They made things work despite their differing genres, and they had charisma throughout the whole thing. They also delivered live vocally which is always good. Although neither of the songs were really the genre I jam to (aka, musical theatre), and the performance did pose some significant health risks (just your usual epileptic fits and asthma attacks, no biggie) I thought that the performance was entertaining.

Kacey Musgraves

Again, I'd never heard of her, and again, country isn't my thing, but I thought her performance of 'Follow Your Arrow' was really awesome. The song was cute, and she has a really nice voice. Plus, she had lights on her cowboy boots, how cool is that? And her outfit was really cute. Anyway, enough about materialistic stuff that probably no one else cares about, I thought the performance was really good. I liked how it was in the round, because that's kinda cool, and I like that it was low key and not over the top. She almost made me tolerate country music!

Paul McCartney sort of feat. Ringo Starr

It seems to be a Beatles filled night, as the two ex band members came together in a sort of reunion. Seriously, it wasn't much of a reunion at all, it was more like 2 separate people that happen to be performing on the same stage. However, I thought it was nice. I mean, I'm not a major Beatles fan or anything (or really anything close to it), but I thought they did a good job. I have to say, it was quite entertaining when the camera cut to Yoko Ono jamming in the audience, but that's a different story. Again, considering they're both getting on, they did super well. It was fun, it was nice, but no one really cared because they were just basking in the Beatle-ness of it all.

Willie Nelson, Blake Shelton, Merle Haggard and Kris Kristofferson

Yep, you guessed right, more country. They were all really good, and their performance was entertaining, but I seriously can't take any more country. I just find it boring, and that country twang can become very grating after a while. For all you country fans out there, this would be like a massive group of awesome, but for me, it's just all become a bit much. It was cool how they all just kind of roamed around the stage with their guitars, and were totally comfortable just sticking to their formation. But again, it's country, so the review I give it cannot be any better than satisfactory.

Nile Rodgers, Pharrell Williams, Daft Punk and Stevie Wonder

It seems that the Grammys are very big on grabbing 4 different artists and plonking them together to perform something. These four unlikely artists all came together to perform 'Get Lucky'. I have to say, Pharrell Williams should try and avoid live performances. Don't get me wrong, some parts were good, but the majority of the time he was just being covered by the back up singers. Everyone else was really good, and Daft Punk were cool doing their thing in the back in space helmets (don't ask, just watch). It did kind of get a bit cray when bits of 'Le Freak' were suddenly added to the song, but I just went with it. It was a pretty cool performance. It was different, and I am totally a fan of things that are out of the norm. Yeah, overall it was kind of odd but still entertaining, which is basically just a description of the Grammy awards, so that works well.

Carol King and Sara Bareilles

These two artists came together to perform a mashup of Carol's 'Beautiful' and Sara's 'Brave'. I have to say, this was way better than her performance at the People's Choice Awards. The harmonies were really nice, and their singing was really on point. It was actually such a major improvement from the last time Sara sang, it's ridiculous. It was a really enjoyable performance, and the fact that they were both just playing away at the piano was a nice touch.

Lang Lang and Metallica

Strangely enough, these two totally separate entities came together to perform an intense rendition of 'One'. It was insane, legitimately insane. I feel sorry for whoever has to pay the bills for the electricity and pyrotechnics, seriously. Again, despite the odd combination, they created something pretty cool. Despite it once again not being my preferred genre, I could appreciate what they were doing. The vocals were actually surprisingly good, and the belting wasn't too manic which kind of helped to keep in the realm of the normal (and the realm of the likeable). What I thought was really awesome was the fact that they managed to include elements of the classical piano as well as the hardcore rock stuff. Throughout the performance, I felt like I was watching a light show, it was pretty extreme. it was probably another display that could cause an epileptic fit, so be all sufferers.

Macklemore and Ryan Lewis feat. Queen Latifah and Madonna

This musical duo came on stage rocking their song 'Same Love'. Again, this was another light spectacle, but luckily the time, the epileptics are safe. They're just hanging in the background in the shape of church, doing their own thing, luckily not overpowering the performance. I thought it was actually really good. It pretty much sounded like the recorded version, and it had a good message. It was all just being normal, until Queen Latifah popped out from the back and became some kind of priest, holding a massive wedding for all these actual gay couples in the audience. Let's just say, I wasn't expecting that. Was it at all legal? Probably not. But it was a nice thought. Then after everyone was 'married', Madonna came out as well, breaking into her little rendition of 'Open Your Heart' (which TBH was the worst vocal performance in the song, sorry Madonna). I'm actually kind of still recovering from the shock of this performance, it was just so random, in a good way. Everyone in the audience was clapping and crying, it was quite an event.

Miranda Lambert and Billie Joe Armstrong

If it's even possible, it's another country song. These two teamed up to sing during the 'In Memoriam' segment of the award show. It was nice and even better- it was short (thank god). Again, it was country, so I don't have that much nice stuff to say about it. It was short and sweet, and it didn't make me suicidal, all positive things. Sorry, but that's all I can say. The abundance of country music has rendered me wordless.

Nine Inch Nails and Queens of the Stone Age feat. Lindsey Buckingham and Dave Grohl 

Yes, you've officially made it. This is the last performance of the 2014 Grammy awards. Once again, the epileptic lights are back. Was it my kind of song? Absolutely not. But all the artists were good, and it was again, quite a spectacle. It was good and enjoyable, but I still honestly don't know why it was the closing number. Personally, I think the massive gay wedding should've been used to end the award show, but that's just me. I guess it's not the artist's fault, there's just no way they could  top everyone else who performed on the night. Also, it didn't help that they cut to about 6 adverts in the middle of the performance, and towards the end, they just put the credits on top of the picture. Plus, you never even got to hear the end of the song, because the award show just randomly ended and cut out the last half. It was pretty odd, but it's okay, because I wasn't really enjoying it that much anyway.

My Awards

Once again, I've decided to done out my own awards for the 2014 Grammys show. Because it just seemed to be jam packed with music the entire time (funny that), there weren't that many on stage intervals to choose from. However, I've managed to put together a reasonable list. Without further ado, here are my winners . . .

Most Ridiculous Hair Flip: Taylor Swift. As I mentioned before, T Swift's totally unnecessary hair flipping during her performance was super weird and made everyone feel uncomfortable. 

Most Stupid Hat: Pharrell Williams. Seriously, it was actually the most absurd pieces of head wear to ever be created (and that includes everything Lady Gaga's worn). 

Worst Reunion Ever: Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr. Did they interact with one another? Not in the slightest. Were they even close to each other? Nope, they managed to stay at an awkward distance the entire time. 

Awkwardest Dancing: Yoko Ono. I spent the entire time worrying about whether or not she was going to break a hip. It was just an uncomfortable moment to be a a part of. 

Most Embarrassing Misspelling: Cory Monteith. As a major Gleek (number one in my opinion), I found this one truly despicable. If you're going to do a eulogy, maybe cross-check the spelling of everyone's names before you do so. 

So I hope you enjoyed my Grammys blog post, and didn't get too bored throughout it. I know what you're all thinking right about now after reading my little music reviews:

I know I do, but thank you all the same. That's all folks. Til' next time . . .

Annabel xx